Saturday, June 19, 2010
A bit more of my story, but I need help now please...
Does anybody out there understand Canadian Family Law and maybe how to fight legal badagering? A quick overview of my issues... 2004 I find out my ex has been cheating on me for our entire relationship, I tried to overlook it and we do councilling. 2005 Her oldest daughter who was big in to drugs, drinking, and working the streets threatens to kill the 4 other children and gramma one night, so I said the daughter had to get help and live elsewhere until she did. The ex decides that her troubled daughter was more important than the family (yes the ex has many personal issues as well) her other daughter and our son (along with her boyfriends) and moves out saing "she just needs space" but drags he other daughter and our son with her. So teachers (against standard policy), coucillors and several judges agree that at least our son should not live in that environment and should live with me (dad), mom finds free , moraless and unscrupulus lawyer who in last count dragged me to the tune of 10's of thousands of dollars to 7+ judges and court proceedings to get our son on a 7 day rotation (I wont tell you here what this has done to his life or schooling). (The ex also dragged her other 3 childrens 3 fathers through hell to the point where they basically dont exist in the kids lives). So now Im broke and doing my best for our son and the kids I can help. Lots more story.... anyway I bring you to today... My house burnt down May 1st 2010, I was stupid enough to put her name on the house along with mine but other than outright taking the house from me she would settle for nothing and would not take her name off, she has no posessions in the house and has not lived there for 6 years. After the fire she signed off on conents and living allaowance with the insurance company, which I thought was great. and we would deal with the structure seperatly. Well now she has trying to get her lawyer to withdraw that agreement and she wants control of the living allowance and content monies. Which would essentially at this point put me on the street which as I see itat would now show me as incapable of taking care of our son and probably remove him from me (I may be wrong in my thinking here, I am not her, maybe she only wants more money, both in insurance and support). So what I hope someone can give me insight to law or canadian law as how she has any right or claim to something she has no (what should be) legal interest in. I cannot afford a lawyer, so I will have to represent myself. I hope I make a little sense in what i wrote, the story is much bigger and longer, but anything will help. Thanks
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Not enough "mean" moms or dads
Mean Moms and fathers
Someday when my children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates a parent, I will
tell them, as my Mean mom/dad told me: I loved you
enough . . . to ask where you were going, with whom,
and what time you would be home.
I loved you enough to be silent and let you
discover that your new best friend was a creep.
I loved you enough to stand over you for two hours
while you cleaned your room, a job that should have taken 15 minutes.
I loved you enough to let you see anger,
disappointment, and tears in my eyes. Children must
learn that their parents aren't perfect.
I loved you enough to let you assume the
responsibility for your actions even when the
penalties were so harsh they almost broke my heart.
But most of all, I loved you enough . . . to say
NO when I knew you would hate me for it.
Those were the most difficult battles of all. I'm
glad I won them, because in the end you won, too.
And someday when your children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates parents, you will tell them.
Was your mom/dad mean? I know mine was. We had the
meanest mother/father in the whole world! While other kids
ate candy for breakfast, we had to have cereal, eggs, and toast.
When others had a Pepsi and a Twinkie for lunch, we had to eat sandwiches and juice.
And you can guess our mother/father fixed us a dinner that was
different from what other kids had, too.
mother/father insisted on knowing where we were at all
times. You'd think we were convicts in a prison. She
had to know who our friends were, and what we were
doing with them. She insisted that if we said we
would be gone for an hour, we would be gone for an hour or less.
We were ashamed to admit it, but she had the nerve
to break the Child Labor Laws by making us work We
had to wash the dishes, make the beds, learn to
cook, vacuum the floor, do laundry, empty the trash
and all sorts of cruel jobs. I think she would lie
awake at night thinking of more things for us to do.
She always insisted on us telling the truth, the
whole truth, and nothing but the truth. By the time
we were teenagers, she could read our minds and had
eyes in the back of her head. Then, life was really tough!
mother/father wouldn't let our friends just honk the horn
when they drove up. They had to come up to the door
so she could meet them. While everyone else could
date when they were 12 or 13, we had to wait until we were 16 ..
Because of our mother/father we missed out on lots of
things other kids experienced. None of us have ever
been caught shoplifting, vandalizing other's
property or ever arrested for any crime. It was all her fault.
Now that we have left home, we are all educated,
honest adults. We are doing our best to be mean
parents just like mom/dad was.
I think that is what's wrong with the world today.
It just doesn't have enough mean moms and dads!
Someday when my children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates a parent, I will
tell them, as my Mean mom/dad told me: I loved you
enough . . . to ask where you were going, with whom,
and what time you would be home.
I loved you enough to be silent and let you
discover that your new best friend was a creep.
I loved you enough to stand over you for two hours
while you cleaned your room, a job that should have taken 15 minutes.
I loved you enough to let you see anger,
disappointment, and tears in my eyes. Children must
learn that their parents aren't perfect.
I loved you enough to let you assume the
responsibility for your actions even when the
penalties were so harsh they almost broke my heart.
But most of all, I loved you enough . . . to say
NO when I knew you would hate me for it.
Those were the most difficult battles of all. I'm
glad I won them, because in the end you won, too.
And someday when your children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates parents, you will tell them.
Was your mom/dad mean? I know mine was. We had the
meanest mother/father in the whole world! While other kids
ate candy for breakfast, we had to have cereal, eggs, and toast.
When others had a Pepsi and a Twinkie for lunch, we had to eat sandwiches and juice.
And you can guess our mother/father fixed us a dinner that was
different from what other kids had, too.
mother/father insisted on knowing where we were at all
times. You'd think we were convicts in a prison. She
had to know who our friends were, and what we were
doing with them. She insisted that if we said we
would be gone for an hour, we would be gone for an hour or less.
We were ashamed to admit it, but she had the nerve
to break the Child Labor Laws by making us work We
had to wash the dishes, make the beds, learn to
cook, vacuum the floor, do laundry, empty the trash
and all sorts of cruel jobs. I think she would lie
awake at night thinking of more things for us to do.
She always insisted on us telling the truth, the
whole truth, and nothing but the truth. By the time
we were teenagers, she could read our minds and had
eyes in the back of her head. Then, life was really tough!
mother/father wouldn't let our friends just honk the horn
when they drove up. They had to come up to the door
so she could meet them. While everyone else could
date when they were 12 or 13, we had to wait until we were 16 ..
Because of our mother/father we missed out on lots of
things other kids experienced. None of us have ever
been caught shoplifting, vandalizing other's
property or ever arrested for any crime. It was all her fault.
Now that we have left home, we are all educated,
honest adults. We are doing our best to be mean
parents just like mom/dad was.
I think that is what's wrong with the world today.
It just doesn't have enough mean moms and dads!
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Running for childrens rights in Canada
I cam across an article in my local paper about boxer who is running across Canada to raise awareness about some of the mistakes that the Canadian Family legal systen is failing our children. Kere is the link, it is pretty good and I think he is right and we need to help him... http://www.crosscanadarun4thechildren.com/. Read it and do what you can....
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